DO understand that if you are at an event where the entertainment and refreshments are being paid for by a brand with the express purpose of crafting a particular image or ideal, that your presence is as calculated as the posters on the wall, and they will want it documented.
DON’T think that by saying no to a photographer at a sponsored party you’re any less of a whore. Smiling for the guy that’s paid to shoot you isn’t kissing on the mouth, it’s the blowjob itself and that drink in your hand means you’ve already taken the money.
DO appreciate that there is a world of difference between an event that exists to sell an idea and a typical night on the town.
DON’T feel any obligation to contribute the cache of your image to a place where you’re paying.
DO be polite to someone who is just doing the job they’re paid to do.
DON’T give the same courtesy to obnoxious hobbiests who wield their cameras like substitute phalluses.
DO realise that it’s easy to tell the difference, because the pros are never visibly high.
DON’T forget that even though we have easy access to the means of producing them, images still have power.
DO use this power for good, for pleasure and for purpose.
DON’T let the desire to feel documented to overpower your ability to have a good time.
DO look each other in the eyes and have a long engaging conversation about something that you care about.
DON’T spend the entire evening with your arms slung with no significance around one another as you stare vacuously into the middle distance.
DO take that phone out of your mouth, you’re embarrassing your older self.
DON’T think that doing something interesting, edgy or provocative in a photograph confers any of those qualities onto you.
DO be aware of the point at which a trawling interest in the lives and movements of your friends becomes a profoundly narcissistic endeavour.
DON’T worry if you cross that threshold sometimes, we’re all human. But please don’t do it too often.
DO remember that often the only difference between a photographer and a creep is that the photographer is holding a camera.
DON’T use your DSLR like a peacock’s tail, it’s the social equivalent of individually packaged cheese slices.
DO feel free to run that photograph even though I don’t look great in it, when I told you it was okay to take it, I was consenting.
DON’T act like invading my privacy by putting a flash in my face, without my permission, to create a page impression on your shitty, exploitative blog is doing me a favour.
DO realise we’re getting better and better at the kind of tech that lets you search for a face without a keyword.
DON’T lose sight of the fact that someday you may want a real job.
DO retain a willingness to be surprised by a medium, even when it is completely over saturated.
DON’T assume that this will happen very often, if every snapper with a claim to ‘post-somethingness’ was telling the truth, they wouldn’t be waking up next to seventeen year olds with modelling aspirations right now.
